Funny Happy Birthday Jokes for Adults
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Altogether Cake Love
Did you hear about the love affair betwixt saccharide and cream? It was icing on the cake.
It'll Do the Job…
At that place is only one cure for gray pilus. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine. —P.Grand. Wodehouse
Whoops, No Present
Forget about the past, you can't modify information technology. Forget about the futurity, you can't predict it. Forget about the present, I didn't become you one.
Sappy Altogether!
Q: Did yous hear nearly the tree'southward birthday?
A: Information technology was a sappy one!
Family Age Jokes
Age is a relative thing. All my relatives keep reminding me how old I am.
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An Elephant Never Forgets
Q: What did the elephant want for his birthday?
A: A trunk full of gifts.
Goldfish Birthday
Q: What do you lot say to your goldfish on his birthday?
A: Have a fin-tastic mean solar day.
Up For Bid
You know yous're getting old when you go to an antique sale and three people bid on you.
Birthday Cake Visit
Q: Why did the birthday cake visit the psychologist?
A: Because it was feeling crumby.
Golf Block
Q: When is a birthday cake similar a golf ball?
A: When you lot piece information technology.
Hither are more hilarious golf game jokes that are better than a hole in ane!
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That'southward One Stuffed Beast
Q: What did the teddy acquit say when it was offered some birthday cake?
A: No thank you, I'one thousand stuffed.
Coffee Lovers Birthday
Q: What kind of birthday cake practice yous get for a coffee lover?
A: Choco-latte. (Here are more coffee puns for a whole latte laughs!)
Always Getting Older
Q: What goes up and never comes down?
A: Your age.
Obvious Birthday Joke
Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays, live the longest.
Birthday Magic
Q: What did the witch do on her birthday?
A: She spellabrates.[Source: Jokes4Us]
Trick or treat! You lot need to learn these corny Halloween jokes.
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Purr-fectly Delicious
Q: What does a cat like to swallow on his birthday?
A: Mice cream and block.
Moby Dick Birthday
Q: How did Moby Dick celebrate his altogether?
A: He had a whale of a time.
Cocky Honey
Birthdays are like Valentine'southward 24-hour interval for one. — Jordan Trafford
Too Much of a Good Thing
I similar birthdays, only I think besides many can impale you.
Birthdays in Heaven
Q: What practice they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
A: Affections food cake.
Do you lot ever have trouble making it to the punchline? Here are 75 short jokes anyone can think!
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Shiver Me Timbers!
Q: What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
A: Aye, matey!
Pickle Birthday
Q: How do pickles celebrate their birthdays?
A: They enjoy the moment.
True cat Birthday
Q: Where exercise yous get a birthday present for your cat?
A: From a cat-alogue.
Birthday Toast
I always experience warm on my birthday because people don't stop toasting me.
Fewer Guests
You know you lot're getting one-time when you take more than candles on your cake than friends at your birthday political party.
Here are 50 more funnyjokes to gloat National Tell a Joke Day!
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Surprise Parties
I've never enjoyed my surprise altogether parties because all I can recall about is how good my friends are at lying to my face up.
Thank you, Facebook!
Cheers to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don't really know. — Andy Borowitz
What Have Yous Achieved?
Birthdays are simply participation awards in life. — Brian Millward
Forget-Me-Not
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
Always Changing Numbers
It's easier to remember your age if you don't change it every year.
Don't miss these knee joint-slapping knock knock jokes!
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Baby Cakes
It's always a proficient idea to make friends with babies. That's gratuitous cake once a year for a lifetime.
Sound Investment
My female parent-in-law is like a fine vino. She gets more expensive with historic period. — Ben McKay
Short Term Memory's the First to Go
Today is your birthday, and so congratulate yourself—especially if y'all're still immature enough to remember it.
Identity Crunch
I used to exist a boy trapped in a woman's trunk. Just later 9 long months, I was finally born!
Tin can't Blow Out the Candles
The older you get, the more you lot need to go along a burn extinguisher close to the cake.
These hilarious DIY jokes are sure to bring down the firm!
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Crazy Coincidence, That!
Q: What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in mutual?
A: They were all born on holidays.
Unique Souvenir
Every twelvemonth on my birthday, I looked forward to my aunt'southward gift—a scarf, hat, or sweater knitted past hand. One year, she must have had better things to do considering I received a ball of yarn, knitting needles, and a how-to-knit book. Her bill of fare read, "Scarf, some assembly required."
Altogether Greetings
Greeting Cards: When y'all intendance plenty to ship the very all-time but not enough to actually write something.
Practise the Math
I read that 60 is the new 40, which is a actually nice way of maxim that I'll have to work an extra 25 years before I can retire. — Brian Millward
Drinking glass Half-Empty
I was built-in to exist a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative.
These are the all-time jokes from upward-and-coming Canadian comedians.
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Bald Man Birthday
Q: What did the baldheaded guy say when he was given a comb for his birthday?
A: Thanks, I'll never office with it.
Who'southward Counting?
If you feel a scrap lone, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you upwardly, remember… You lot tin always change your altogether on Facebook!
Under the Knife
You should never get plastic surgery to wait younger. You should get information technology to look rich. — Brian Millward
Your Pleasure, My Pain
Birthdays are similar bank holidays: most of us have to work. — Hashemite kingdom of jordan Trafford
Physics Lesson
Birthdays are a nifty time to end and capeesh gravity. Certain, it makes things sag as you lot get older, simply information technology also keeps your cake from flying all over the room so you don't have to chase it. — Greg Tamblyn
Every science-lover will appreciate thesephysics jokes.
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Twin Dilemma
I finally realized my parents favoured my twin brother. Information technology hit me when they asked me to blow upward balloons for his surprise birthday party. [Source: OneLineFun]
Words of Wisdom
Y'all can't help getting older but y'all don't have to get old. — George Burns
Mandatory Migration
My parents didn't want to motility to Florida, only they turned 60 and that'southward the police force. —Jerry Seinfeld
Due Process
We could certainly slow the crumbling procedure down if it had to piece of work its manner through Congress. — Will Rogers
Brand a Wish
Beloved eyelashes, wishbones, dandelions, pennies, shooting stars, 11:11 and birthday candles: Do your chore.
Need a one-liner to spice up your wedding speech? Hither are 170 hilarious jokes about marriage!
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Have the Wheel
Regular naps preclude old historic period, peculiarly if you lot have them while driving. [Source: Huffington Post]
They Call it Nesting
I'chiliad at an age when my dorsum goes out more than than I do. — Phyllis Diller
Off-white Warning
If y'all're going to have a nap at this age, let us know—we wouldn't want to bury you by accident. — Deepak Kashyap
Altogether Burn
He'south then old that when he orders a three-minute egg, they ask for the money up forepart. —George Burns
Catch-22
Past the fourth dimension a man is wise plenty to sentry his pace, he's too old to go anywhere. —Billy Crystal
Don't miss these family friendly jokes shared past our readers.
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It's All Relative
Looking 50 is great—if y'all're lx. —Joan Rivers
The Pocket-sized Print
You can live to be a hundred if y'all give up all the things that brand you lot want to live to be a hundred. —Woody Allen
Thoughtful Gesture
We put only a single candle on your cake, as we didn't want you to strain your lungs. — Deepak Kashyap
It Can Be a Blessing
At your age having a clear conscience is usually a sign of bad retention. —Steven Wright
Sleeping Arrangements
Y'all know y'all're old when you and your teeth don't sleep together.[Source: Jokes4Us]
Ready to groan? Here are 50 bad jokes you can't assistance but express mirth at!
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But It's For Me!
You lot know why I feel older? I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it. —Joan Rivers
Hey, Information technology Works
Q: What's the best fashion to go a man to retrieve your ceremony?
A: Get married on his altogether.[Source: Jokes4Us]
Birthday Budget
You know y'all're getting erstwhile when the candles toll more than the block. —Bob Hope
Isn't It Ironic?
A birthday is a bang-up time to take a moment to capeesh the picayune things. That said, I know that spotting niggling things is easier said than done at your age! Happy Birthday![Source: Birthday Wishes]
Ask a Empty-headed Question
Q: "Were whatever famous men born on your birthday?"
A: "No, just little babies."[Source: Jokes4Us]
These are the funniest Reader'due south Assimilate jokes of all time!
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Throw Information technology to the Current of air
You know you're getting sometime when you realize that caution is the simply thing you care to exercise.[Source: Jokes4Us]
Accept a Jiff
The emergency department is on speed dial but in instance you have an unexpected asthma set on blowing the candles.[Source: Birthday Wishes]
With Great Age Comes Cracking…
Another yr to prove that older doesn't really mean wiser. Happy altogether![Source: Birthday Wishes]
Cake With Candles
Q: Md, doctor—why exercise I go heartburn every time I eat birthday cake?
A: Try taking the candles off.
If you enjoyed these birthday jokes, don't miss this roundup of the best Canadian jokes.
Originally Published: May 31, 2021
Source: https://www.readersdigest.ca/culture/birthday-jokes/
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